Why Feeling Loved Has Become So Complicated in 2026
There is a strange emotional paradox humming beneath modern life right now. We are texting constantly, reacting instantly, sharing endlessly, and yet so many people quietly admit the same thing behind closed doors: “I still don’t feel loved.”
That emotional contradiction sits at the center of an upcoming Spark Salon hosted by Unlikely Collaborators featuring renowned psychologist and bestselling author Sonja Lyubomirsky. On Thursday, May 14 at 7 p.m. PT, Lyubomirsky will lead a timely conversation titled How to Feel Loved, inspired by her newly released book of the same name.
And honestly? This feels less like a lecture and more like emotional archaeology for exhausted modern humans trying to decode connection in a hyper-distracted era.
Hosted at Unlikely Collaborators’ headquarters in Santa Monica and livestreamed globally, the evening explores a deceptively simple question: Why do some people feel deeply loved while others, in similar relationships, still feel emotionally invisible?
Lyubomirsky’s work suggests the answer is not always rooted in how much love exists around us, but in how we interpret, recognize, and receive it.
That idea lands with particular force in 2026, a cultural moment where people are increasingly fluent in therapy language but often still starving for genuine emotional resonance. We know the vocabulary of healing. We repost affirmations. We send heart emojis like confetti. Yet many people still struggle to feel emotionally safe, understood, or emotionally held.
According to Lyubomirsky, the missing bridge may be perception itself.
Drawing from years of research in well-being and relationship science, she explores how small relational shifts, like listening differently, expressing appreciation more intentionally, or changing how we interpret another person’s actions, can fundamentally reshape how connected we feel.
The premise is quietly revolutionary: what if feeling loved is not passive? What if it is something we actively help create?
That question sits at the heart of Unlikely Collaborators’ broader mission. Founded by Elizabeth R. Koch, the nonprofit uses its Perception Box™ framework to examine how personal experiences, beliefs, fears, and even physiology shape the way we interpret reality. The organization has built a reputation for hosting deeply reflective conversations that blend psychology, neuroscience, creativity, wellness, and human behavior into something that feels far more intimate than a traditional panel discussion.
Their Spark Salons have previously welcomed an eclectic roster of thinkers and cultural voices including Lisa Feldman Barrett, Wendy Suzuki, Krista Tippett, Michael Norton, and Ian Manuel.
Still, this upcoming salon may resonate differently because love itself has become such a loaded emotional currency.
People are tired of transactional relationships. Tired of performative vulnerability. Tired of being “connected” but not emotionally nourished.
How to Feel Loved arrives like a soft lantern in that fog.
Lyubomirsky, a Distinguished Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Riverside and a Fellow of the American Association for the Advancement of Science, is already widely known for her influential books The How of Happiness and The Myths of Happiness. Her latest work expands that research into the emotional architecture of intimacy and belonging.
For attendees, the evening offers both reflection and practicality. The event begins with a reception at 6 p.m., followed by the main program at 7 p.m. sharp. In-person guests will also receive a complimentary copy of How to Feel Loved.
And perhaps that is the deeper invitation here: not simply to learn about relationships, but to reconsider the stories we tell ourselves about connection.
Because sometimes love is present long before we are able to truly recognize it.
Event Information
How to Feel Loved – Spark Salon with Sonja Lyubomirsky, PhD
Thursday, May 14, 2026
6:00 p.m. PT – Doors & Reception
7:00 p.m. PT – Program Begins
8:00 p.m. PT – Reception
Free Admission (Registration Required)
Register for In-Person Attendance:
Eventbrite Registration Page
Watch Online:
Livestream Access